Edward who...?? It's all about Werewolf Jacob now! Especially since I found we share the same birthday (only 11 years apart...)
Boy do I feel old.
Monday, November 23, 2009
FUNNY
Black November
When I was a young turkey, new to the coop,
My big brother Mike took me out on the stoop.
Then he sat me down, and he spoke real slow,
And he told me there was something that I had to know.
His look and his tone I will always remember,
When he told me of the horrors of . . . Black November.
"Come about August, now listen to me,
Each day you'll get six meals instead of just three.
And soon you'll be thick, where once you were thin,
And you'll grow a big rubbery thing under your chin.
And then one morning when you're warm in your bed,
In'll burst the farmer's wife, and hack off your head.
Then she'll pluck out all your feathers so you're bald'n pink,
And scoop out all your insides and leave ya lyin' in the sink.
"And then comes the worst part" he said not bluffing,
"She'll spread your cheeks and pack your rear with stuffing".
Well, the rest of his words were too grim to repeat,
I sat on the stoop like a winged piece of meat,
And decided on the spot that to avoid being cooked,
I'd have to lay low and remain overlooked.
I began a new diet of nuts and granola,
High-roughage salads, juice and diet cola.
And as they ate pastries, chocolates and crepes,
I stayed in my room doing Richard Simmonds tapes.
I maintained my weight of two pounds and a half,
And tried not to notice when the bigger birds laughed,
But 'twas I who was laughing, when under my breath,
As they chomped and they chewed, ever closer to death.
And sure enough when Black November rolled around,
I was the last turkey left in the entire compound.
So now I'm a pet in the farmer's wife's lap,
I haven't a worry, so I eat and I nap.
She held me today, while sewing and humming,
And smiled at me and said, "Christmas is coming . . ."
When I was a young turkey, new to the coop,
My big brother Mike took me out on the stoop.
Then he sat me down, and he spoke real slow,
And he told me there was something that I had to know.
His look and his tone I will always remember,
When he told me of the horrors of . . . Black November.
"Come about August, now listen to me,
Each day you'll get six meals instead of just three.
And soon you'll be thick, where once you were thin,
And you'll grow a big rubbery thing under your chin.
And then one morning when you're warm in your bed,
In'll burst the farmer's wife, and hack off your head.
Then she'll pluck out all your feathers so you're bald'n pink,
And scoop out all your insides and leave ya lyin' in the sink.
"And then comes the worst part" he said not bluffing,
"She'll spread your cheeks and pack your rear with stuffing".
Well, the rest of his words were too grim to repeat,
I sat on the stoop like a winged piece of meat,
And decided on the spot that to avoid being cooked,
I'd have to lay low and remain overlooked.
I began a new diet of nuts and granola,
High-roughage salads, juice and diet cola.
And as they ate pastries, chocolates and crepes,
I stayed in my room doing Richard Simmonds tapes.
I maintained my weight of two pounds and a half,
And tried not to notice when the bigger birds laughed,
But 'twas I who was laughing, when under my breath,
As they chomped and they chewed, ever closer to death.
And sure enough when Black November rolled around,
I was the last turkey left in the entire compound.
So now I'm a pet in the farmer's wife's lap,
I haven't a worry, so I eat and I nap.
She held me today, while sewing and humming,
And smiled at me and said, "Christmas is coming . . ."
Friday, November 20, 2009
I'm one of THOSE people.
I went with a few friends to go see the midnight showing of Twilight. It was really good and left me hanging at the end!
I counted only a handful of other moms there, the theater was mostly packed with 14 year old girls! It was a fun experience though, all the screaming and hyperventilating... myself included.
Don't judge.
I counted only a handful of other moms there, the theater was mostly packed with 14 year old girls! It was a fun experience though, all the screaming and hyperventilating... myself included.
Don't judge.
Thursday, November 12, 2009
THANKSGIVING
Man, do I feel a million pounds lighter now. So, this year my inlaws will be out of town, my dad lives in Utah and my mom will probably (even though she denies it) spend it with her boyfriends family. This is the FIRST year we wont have anyone over! We were debating on who to invite over so it's not just the four of us!
Eric and I thought more about it and decided to say "SCREW IT, WE'RE GOING OUT!" Man, an I excited! We were thinking of the melting pot, Ruths Chris, or a dinner cruise (somewhere really nice). As soon as it sunk in we were NOT in fact cooking any sort of Thanksgiving meal, I literally felt lighter! The holidays are SO stressful with all the shopping, gift giving, expectations, etc... (don't get me wrong, I LOVE the holidays and I LOVE Thanksgiving... but this is a nice charge!) it's nice to have a break this year and just go out with my family to a nice restaurant and not have to spent money on a menu, cooking, or cleaning up afterwards. This might possibly be the best Thanksgiving we've ever had, LOL!
Eric and I thought more about it and decided to say "SCREW IT, WE'RE GOING OUT!" Man, an I excited! We were thinking of the melting pot, Ruths Chris, or a dinner cruise (somewhere really nice). As soon as it sunk in we were NOT in fact cooking any sort of Thanksgiving meal, I literally felt lighter! The holidays are SO stressful with all the shopping, gift giving, expectations, etc... (don't get me wrong, I LOVE the holidays and I LOVE Thanksgiving... but this is a nice charge!) it's nice to have a break this year and just go out with my family to a nice restaurant and not have to spent money on a menu, cooking, or cleaning up afterwards. This might possibly be the best Thanksgiving we've ever had, LOL!
Report cards
Well, both the kids got their report cards this week. Well, Pinkys was more of an evaluation...
Pinky's said she is focusing on learning letters/numbers, learning to write with a pencil and cut with scissors! She makes friends easily and her favorite toy is the vetrinary bin!
Elle did fantastic! Her teacher said I did a great job homeschooling her. I said I wasn't so sure sometimes, LOL! But apparently she is one of the best readers in the class, and has a mature sense of 'higher order thinking' she called it. She tried explaining it, it made sense at the time, but it wont make sense if I try to explain it on here! She also got the highest math score in the class. The teacher said she doesn't give out high grades for math very often, but Elle is exceeding, YIPPEE!!!
Her report card showed her exceeding in most things with a few 'on level' sprinkled in there.
I'm so happy, I wasn't sure what to expect with this first report card since being back in school.
Eric gave a couple bucks for each A and A+ she got... he gave her 26 bucks. Man, was she excited, you'd think she'd win the lottery!
Pinky's said she is focusing on learning letters/numbers, learning to write with a pencil and cut with scissors! She makes friends easily and her favorite toy is the vetrinary bin!
Elle did fantastic! Her teacher said I did a great job homeschooling her. I said I wasn't so sure sometimes, LOL! But apparently she is one of the best readers in the class, and has a mature sense of 'higher order thinking' she called it. She tried explaining it, it made sense at the time, but it wont make sense if I try to explain it on here! She also got the highest math score in the class. The teacher said she doesn't give out high grades for math very often, but Elle is exceeding, YIPPEE!!!
Her report card showed her exceeding in most things with a few 'on level' sprinkled in there.
I'm so happy, I wasn't sure what to expect with this first report card since being back in school.
Eric gave a couple bucks for each A and A+ she got... he gave her 26 bucks. Man, was she excited, you'd think she'd win the lottery!
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
Hiking
Hiking is a family pastime we enjoy doing. Our dog loves it just as much too! I wasn't up for this this last time though, so Eric just took the dog and Elle. (Pinky and I stayed home and napped!).
They got some super cute shots though...
They got some super cute shots though...
Fall leaves...
There are so many leaves right now it's hard to tell where the street is! Here's a shot from out my dining room window! Just this morning they cleared the street... but all this past week it looked like this!
Halloween
I've packed up all the orange decorations, and I'm ready for FALL decor now (soon to be replaced with CHRISTMAS stuff...). But I have to post a few hallowenn pictures!
Here's gramps with the girls.
Here's Pinky at Erics office party, so cute!
Ummm... what is she doing??
Here's all of us at a party. This was the first year that Eric and I both dressed up with he kids!
Here's gramps with the girls.
Here's Pinky at Erics office party, so cute!
Ummm... what is she doing??
Here's all of us at a party. This was the first year that Eric and I both dressed up with he kids!
New edition to Elles mouth...
It's true... my 7 year old has braces!... she also still has the extender glued to the top of her mouth and the lip bumper glued to the bottom of her mouth. It's alot of metal in that small space!
She takes it in stride though! The dentist let her pick out colors for the braces, so she picked black and red ones. At least we are getting it all over with now so when she's 12 and 13, while all her friends are getting them, she will have already been the done that!
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